April, 2005

By Sandra Akacem
Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Upper Valley, Norwich VT

A Child In Combat

My son is a lieutenant in the United States (US) Navy. He flies an EA-6B-Prowler, electronic warfare aircraft. He has been deployed to both Afghanistan and Iraq.

Sitting beside me in my office is a woman whose 20-year- old son is being deployed to Afghanistan in three weeks with the US Army Airborne Infantry. A dear friend’s son, a former Navy Seal, is leaving for Afghanistan as I write this article. He has been assigned to work in covert operations.

We as parents must find a way to live through this time when our children are at risk. We hear the spoken and unspoken fear in their voices. They are told horror stories and half truths to prepare them for the unthinkable things that they may have to do or witness. We know that all we have taught them about how to be decent human beings will probably cause them to have nightmares about what they now have to do as citizens of our country.

As parents, we have to support our children and hope that the world doesn’t judge them too harshly for doing a job that many of us find hard to support. We watch them mature much faster than they should have to and hear how much they miss and appreciate home and family.

They are told to take their dress uniforms into battle. When they make their funeral arrangements (a sobering experience for a very young man or woman), they are required to pick the friends who will escort their body back, just in case.... They worry about their friends who have spouses and children of their own.

We pray that our children will survive, and that the emotional scars won’t be too deep. We pray that they will not be filled with hatred as a result of their experience, but instead feel more compassion for their fellow human beings. We pray for wisdom and comforting words to give them. We pray they don’t hear the fear in our voices when we talk to them. We pray for peace...